Fluent Essays

1. John Gottman identified dangerous or damaging communication issues known as the “four horsemen of the apocalypse.”  Identify and describe the four horsemen, which are problematic issues that affect communication.  Provide examples of how you have used the four horsemen when communicating with others. 2. Marriage and cohabitation are often debated in our society.  What are your opinions on the pros and cons of cohabitation versus marriage?  Would you choose cohabitation or marriage?  Explain why you would choose cohabitation or marriage. 3. From reading the textbook and learning information in this class, what have you learned about yourself and your family?  How are you applying what you have learned about family studies in your personal life and family relationships?  Please explain your answer and provide personal examples. Eleventh Edition The Marriage and Family Experience Intimate Relationships in a Changing Society Bryan Strong Formerly of University of California, Santa Cruz Christine DeVault Cabrillo College Theodore F. Cohen Ohio Wesleyan University Australia • Brazil • Japan • Korea • Mexico • Singapore • Spain • United Kingdom • United States 24251_00_fm_pi-xxv.indd i24251_00_fm_pi-xxv.indd i 1/16/10 4:02:25 AM1/16/10 4:02:25 AM Copyright 2011 Cengage Learning. All Rights Reserved. May not be copied, scanned, or duplicated, in whole or in part. 52609_00_fm_pi-pxxvi.indd ii52609_00_fm_pi-pxxvi.indd ii 2/1/10 11:37:43 PM2/1/10 11:37:43 PM This an electronic version of the print textbook. Due to electronic rights restrictions, some third party may be suppressed. Edition review has deemed that any suppres ed content does not materially affect the over all learning experience. The publisher reserves the right to remove the contents from this title at any time if subsequent rights restrictions require it. For valuable information on pricing, previous editions, changes to current editions, and alternate format, please visit www.cengage.com/highered to search by ISBN#, author, title, or keyword for materials in your areas of interest. s is Copyright 2011 Cengage Learning. All Rights Reserved. May not be copied, scanned, or duplicated, in whole or in part. http://www.cengage.com/highered © 2011, 2008 Wadsworth Cengage Learning ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. No part of this work covered by the copyright herein may be reproduced, transmitted, stored or used in any form or by any means graphic, electronic, or mechanical, including but not limited to photocopying, recording, scanning, digitizing, taping, Web distribution, information networks, or information storage and retrieval systems, except as permitted under Section 107 or 108 of the 1976 United States Copyright Act, without the prior written permission of the publisher. Library of Congress Control Number: 2009942041 Student Edition: ISBN-13: 978-0-534-62425-5 ISBN-10: 0-534-62425-1 Loose-leaf Edition: ISBN-13: 978-0-8400-3221-8 ISBN-10: 0-8400-3221-8 Wadsworth 20 Davis Drive Belmont, CA 94002-3098 USA Cengage Learning is a leading provider of customized learning solutions with offi ce locations around the globe, including Singapore, the United Kingdom, Australia, Mexico, Brazil, and Japan. Locate your local offi ce at www.cengage.com/global. Cengage Learning products are represented in Canada by Nelson Education, Ltd. To learn more about Wadsworth, visit www.cengage.com/wadsworth Purchase any of our products at your local college store or at our preferred online store www.CengageBrain.com. The Marriage and Family Experience: Intimate Relationships in a Changing Society, Eleventh Edition Bryan Strong, Christine DeVault, and Theodore F. Cohen Publisher: Linda Schreiber-Ganster Sociology Editor: Erin Mitchell Developmental Editor: Kristin Makarewycz Assistant Editor: Rachael Krapf Editorial Assistant: Pamela Simon Media Editor: Melanie Cregger Marketing Manager: Andrew Keay Marketing Assistant: Jillian Myers Marketing Communications Manager: Laura Localio Content Project Manager: Cheri Palmer Creative Director: Rob Hugel Art Director: Caryl Gorska Print Buyer: Judy Inouye Rights Acquisitions Account Manager, Text: Roberta Broyer Rights Acquisitions Account Manager, Image: Robyn Young Production Service: S4Carlisle Publishing Services Text Designer: Ellen Pettengell Photo Researcher: Sarah Evertson Copy Editor: Bruce Owens Illustrator: S4Carlisle Publishing Services Cover Designer: RHDG Cover Image: Creatas/Photolibrary Compositor: S4Carlisle Publishing Services For product information and technology assistance, contact us at Cengage Learning Customer & Sales Support, 1-800-354-9706. For permission to use material from this text or product, submit all requests online at www.cengage.com/permissions Further permissions questions can be emailed to [email protected] Printed in Canada 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 13 12 11 10 24251_00_fm_pi-xxv.indd ii24251_00_fm_pi-xxv.indd ii 1/23/10 1:52:27 AM1/23/10 1:52:27 AM Copyright 2011 Cengage Learning. All Rights Reserved. May not be copied, scanned, or duplicated, in whole or in part. http://www.cengage.com/global http://www.cengage.com/wadsworth http://www.CengageBrain.com http://www.cengage.com/permissions mailto:[email protected] I dedicate this edition to my parents, Kalman and Eleanor Cohen, whose sixty-year-long marriage has been a wonderful example of how commitment and compromise, along with love and trust, can carry a couple through the many challenges of raising a family and sharing a lifetime together. —Ted Cohen 24251_00_fm_pi-xxv.indd iii24251_00_fm_pi-xxv.indd iii 1/16/10 4:02:25 AM1/16/10 4:02:25 AM Copyright 2011 Cengage Learning. All Rights Reserved. May not be copied, scanned, or duplicated, in whole or in part. brief contents v 1 The Meaning of Marriage and the Family 3 2 Studying Marriages and Families 29 3 Variations in American Family Life 61 4 Gender and Family 103 5 Intimacy, Friendship, and Love 137 6 Understanding Sex and Sexualities 173 7 Communication, Power, and Confl ict 221 8 Marriages in Societal and Individual Perspective 261 9 Unmarried Lives: Singlehood and Cohabitation 303 10 Becoming Parents and Experiencing Parenthood 333 11 Marriage, Work, and Economics 379 12 Intimate Violence and Sexual Abuse 417 13 Coming Apart: Separation and Divorce 451 14 New Beginnings: Single-Parent Families, Remarriages, and Blended Families 485 Appendix A Sexual Structure and the Sexual Response Cycle 510 Appendix B Pregnancy, Conception, and Fetal Development 517 Appendix C The Budget Process 521 Glossary 527 Bibliography 540 Photo Credits 590 Indexes 592 24251_00_fm_pi-xxv.indd v24251_00_fm_pi-xxv.indd v 1/19/10 7:54:36 AM1/19/10 7:54:36 AM Copyright 2011 Cengage Learning. All Rights Reserved. May not be copied, scanned, or duplicated, in whole or in part. vii 1 The Meaning of Marriage and the Family 3 Personal Experience, Social Controversy, and Wishful Thinking 4 Experience versus Expertise 4 Ongoing Social Controversy 4 What Is Marriage? What Is Family? 6 Defi ning Marriage 7 Exploring Diversity Ghost or Spirit Marriage 8 Who May Marry? 8 Forms of Marriage 9 Public Policies, Private Lives The Rights and Benefi ts of Marriage 10 Defi ning Family 11 Functions of Marriages and Families 12 Intimate Relationships 12 Family Ties 12 Economic Cooperation 13 Reproduction and Socialization 13 Real Families The Care Families Give 14 Assignment of Social Roles and Status 15 Why Live in Families? 16 Extended Families and Kinship 17 Extended Families 17 Issues and Insights Technological Togetherness 18 Kinship Systems 18 Multiple Viewpoints of Families 19 Popular Culture Cartoon Controversy: Are SpongeBob SquarePants and The Simpsons Threats to Family Values? 22 The Major Themes of This Text 24 Families Are Dynamic 24 Families Are Diverse 24 Outside Infl uences on Family Experience 25 The Interdependence of Families and the Wider Society 26 Summary 27 2 Studying Marriages and Families 29 How Do We Know? 30 How Popular Culture Misrepresents Family Life 30 Popular Culture Evaluating the Advice and Information Genre 32 contents Preface xix 24251_00_fm_pi-xxv.indd vii24251_00_fm_pi-xxv.indd vii 1/19/10 3:41:53 AM1/19/10 3:41:53 AM Copyright 2011 Cengage Learning. All Rights Reserved. May not be copied, scanned, or duplicated, in whole or in part. (Un)reality Television 32 Mass Media’s Depiction of Families 33 Researching the Family 34 The Importance of Objectivity 34 The Scientifi c Method 35 Concepts and Theories 36 Theoretical Perspectives on Families 37 Macro-Level Theories 37 Family Ecology Theory 37 Issues and Insights Conceptualizing in a Disaster 38 Structural Functionalism Theory 39 Confl ict Theory 40 Feminist Perspectives 42 Micro-Level Theories 43 Symbolic Interaction Theory 43 Social Exchange Theory 45 Family Development Theory 47 Family Systems Theory 48 Applying Theories to Family Experiences 49 Conducting Research on Families 49 Ethics in Family Research 50 Survey Research 51 Clinical Research 53 Observational Research 53 Experimental Research 54 Exploring Diversity Researching Dating Violence Cross-Culturally 55 Applied Family Research 56 How to Think about Research 56 Summary 57 3 Variations in American Family Life 61 American Families across Time 62 The Colonial Era (1607–1776) 62 Nineteenth-Century Marriages and Families 65 Twentieth-Century Marriages and Families 68 Aspects of Contemporary Families 71 Where Are We Now? 72 Factors Promoting Change 74 Popular Culture Can We See Ourselves in Zits? Comic Strips and Changes in Family Life 76 How Contemporary Families Differ from One Another 78 Economic Variations in Family Life 78 Class and Family Life 83 The Dynamic Nature of Social Class 85 Real Families Middle-Class Parenting, Middle-Class Childhood 86 Racial and Ethnic Diversity 88 Defi ning Race, Ethnicity, and Minority Groups 88 Real Families In Times of Trouble 89 Public Policies, Private Lives A Multiracial First Family 91 Ethnic Groups in the United States 91 Summary 100 4 Gender and Family 103 Studying Gender 104 Gender and Inequality 105 Gender Identities, Gendered Roles, and Gender Stereotypes 108 Real Families Third Genders and Pregnant Men 109 Believing in Gender Differences 110 Gender Theory 111 Gender Socialization 112 contentsviii 24251_00_fm_pi-xxv.indd viii24251_00_fm_pi-xxv.indd viii 1/19/10 3:42:01 AM1/19/10 3:42:01 AM Copyright 2011 Cengage Learning. All Rights Reserved. May not be copied, scanned, or duplicated, in whole or in part. ix contents Finding Love and Choosing Partners 153 The Relationship Marketplace 154 Physical Attractiveness: The Halo Effect, Rating, and Dating 154 Going Out, Hanging Out, and Hooking Up 156 Dating 158 Problems in Dating 158 Hooking Up 159 How Love Develops and Ends: Spinning Wheels and Winding Clocks 160 Jealousy: The Green-Eyed Monster 161 Breaking Up 163 Popular Culture Chocolate Hearts, Roses, and . . . Breaking Up? What about “Happy Valentine’s Day”? 165 Unrequited Love 166 Lasting Relationships through the Passage of Time 167 Summary 169 6 Understanding Sex and Sexualities 173 Sexual Scripts 174 Gender and Sexual Scripts 175 Contemporary Sexual Scripts 175 How Do We Learn about Sex? 176 Parental Infl uence 176 Siblings 178 Peer Infl uence 178 Learning Gender Roles and Playing Gendered Roles 114 Childhood and Adolescence 114 Exploring Diversity The Work Daughters Do to Help Families Survive 117 Issues and Insights Girls and Violence 120 Continued Gender Development in Adulthood 121 Gendered Family Experiences 123 Popular Culture Video Gender: Gender, Music Videos, and Video Games 124 Women’s Roles in Families and Work 124 Men’s Roles in Families and Work 126 Continued Constraints of Contemporary Gendered Roles 128 Gender Movements and the Family 129 Real Families Making Gender Matter Less 130 Summary 133 5 Intimacy, Friendship, and Love 137 The Need for Intimacy 138 The Intimacy of Friendship and Love 139 Why It Matters: The Importance of Love 140 Love and American Families 140 Love across Cultures 141 Gender and Intimacy: Men and Women as Friends and Lovers 142 Gender and Friendship 142 Exploring Diversity Isn’t It Romantic? Cultural Constructions of Love 143 Gender and Love 144 Exceptions: Love in Nontraditional Relationships 145 Showing Love: Affection and Sexuality 146 Gender, Sexuality, and Love 147 Sexual Orientation and Love 147 Love, Marriage, and Social Class 148 But What Is This “Crazy Little Thing Called Love”? 148 Studying Love 149 Love and Attachment 151 Love and Commitment 152 24251_00_fm_pi-xxv.indd ix24251_00_fm_pi-xxv.indd ix 1/18/10 2:56:47 PM1/18/10 2:56:47 PM Copyright 2011 Cengage Learning. All Rights Reserved. May not be copied, scanned, or duplicated, in whole or in part. x contents 7 Communication, Power, and Confl ict 221 Verbal and Nonverbal Communication 223 Popular Culture Staying Connected with Technology 223 The Functions of Nonverbal Communication 224 Proximity, Eye Contact, and Touch 225 Gender Differences in Communication 228 Gender Differences in Partner Communication 228 Communication Patterns in Marriage 229 Premarital Communication Patterns and Marital Satisfaction 229 Cohabitation and Later Marital Communication 230 Marital Communication Patterns and Satisfaction 230 Demand–Withdraw Communication 231 Sexual Communication 232 Other Problems in Communication 233 Topic-Related Diffi culty 233 Barriers to Effective Communication 233 Obstacles to Self-Awareness 234 Problems in Self-Disclosure 234 The Importance of Feedback 236 Power, Confl ict, and Intimacy 237 Power and Intimacy 238 Sources of Marital Power 238 Explanations of Marital Power 239 Principle of Least Interest 239 Resource Theory of Power 240 Rethinking Family Power: Feminist Contributions 240 Intimacy and Confl ict 241 Experiencing Confl ict 242 Basic versus Nonbasic Confl icts 242 Dealing with Confl ict 243 Marital Confl ict 243 Comparing Confl ict in Marriage and Cohabitation 243 Media Infl uence 179 A Caution about Data on Sex 181 Popular Culture Sex, Teens, and Television 182 Sexuality in Adolescence and Young Adulthood 182 Adolescent Sexual Behavior 184 Unwanted, Involuntary, and Forced Sex 185 Virginity and Its Loss 185 Issues and Insights The Different Meanings of Virginity Loss 186 Gay, Lesbian, and Bisexual Identities 187 Public Policies, Private Lives “Sexting” and the Law 188 Counting the Gay, Lesbian and Bisexual Populations 189 Gender Display and Sexual Orientation 190 Identifying Oneself as Gay or Lesbian 190 Gay and Lesbian Relationships Compared with Heterosexual Relationships 192 Antigay Prejudice and Discrimination 193 Bisexuality 194 Sexuality in Adulthood 195 Developmental Tasks in Middle Adulthood 195 Sexuality and Middle Age 196 Psychosexual Development in Later Adulthood 197 Adult Sexual Behavior 197 Autoeroticism 197 Interpersonal Sexuality 198 Sexual Expression and Relationships 201 Nonmarital Sexuality 201 Marital Sexuality 203 Relationship Infi delity and Extramarital Sexuality 205 Sexual Enhancement 207 Sexual Problems and Dysfunctions 208 Physical Causes of Sexual Problems 208 Psychological or Relationship Causes 208 Sex between Unequals, Sex between Equals 209 Resolving Sexual Problems 210 Issues Resulting from Sexual Involvement 211 Sexually Transmitted Infections, HIV, and AIDS 211 Protecting Yourself and Others 215 Sexual Responsibility 216 Summary 216 24251_00_fm_pi-xxv.indd x24251_00_fm_pi-xxv.indd x 1/18/10 2:57:09 PM1/18/10 2:57:09 PM Copyright 2011 Cengage Learning. All Rights Reserved. May not be copied, scanned, or duplicated, in whole or in part. xi contents Exploring Diversity Arranged Marriage 266 Religion and Marriage 267 Somewhere between Decline and Resiliency 268 Who Can Marry? 269 Marriage between Blood Relatives 269 Age Restrictions 270 Number of Spouses 270 The Controversy over Same-Sex Marriage 270 Same Sex Marriage: A Quick Look Back 271 Where We Are and Where We’re Going 272 The Marriage Market: Who and How We Choose 272 Homogamy 272 The Marriage Squeeze and Mating Gradient 276 Marital and Family History 276 Residential Propinquity 277 Understanding Homogamy and Intermarriage 278 Theories and Stages of Choosing a Spouse 278 Public Policies, Private Lives What Are We Getting Into? The Essence of Legal Marriage 279 Why Marry? 280 Benefi ts of Marriage 280 Is It Marriage? 281 Or Is It a Good Marriage? 281 Predicting Marital Success 282 Background Factors 282 Personality Factors 283 Relationship Factors 284 Engagement, Cohabitation, and Weddings 284 Engagement 284 Cohabitation 285 Weddings 285 The Stations of Marriage 287 In the Beginning: Early Marriage 288 Establishing Marital Roles 288 Establishing Boundaries 289 Popular Culture Can We Learn Lessons about Marriage from “Wife Swap” and “Trading Spouses?” 290 Social Context and Social Stress 291 Marital Commitments 291 How Parenthood Affects Marriage 292 Middle-Aged Marriages 293 Families as Launching Centers 293 Exploring Diversity Gender and Marital Confl ict among Korean Immigrants 244 Dealing with Anger 244 How Women and Men Handle Confl ict 245 Confl ict Resolution and Relationship Satisfaction 245 Common Confl ict Areas: Sex, Money, and Housework 247 Issues and Insights “What Are We Fighting About?” 248 Consequences of Confl ict 252 Mental Health 252 Physical Health 252 Familial and Child Well-Being 252 Can Confl ict Be Benefi cial? 253 Resolving Confl icts 253 Agreement as a Gift 253 Bargaining 254 Coexistence 254 Forgiveness 254 Helping Yourself by Getting Help 255 Public Policies, Private Lives “Can We Learn How to Manage and Avoid Confl ict?” 256 Summary 257 8 Marriages in Societal and Individual Perspective 261 Marriage in American Society 262 Has There Been a Retreat from Marriage? 264 The Economic and Demographic Aspects Discouraging Marriage 265 What about Class? 265 Does Not Marrying Suggest Rejection of Marriage? 265 24251_00_fm_pi-xxv.indd xi24251_00_fm_pi-xxv.indd xi 1/18/10 2:57:16 PM1/18/10 2:57:16 PM Copyright 2011 Cengage Learning. All Rights Reserved. May not be copied, scanned, or duplicated, in whole or in part. xii contents Real Families Heterosexual Domestic Partnerships 317 Effect of Cohabitation on Later Marriage 321 Public Policies, Private Lives Some Legal Advice for Cohabitors 322 Issues and Insights Living Apart Together 324 Gay and Lesbian Cohabitation 325 Same-Sex Couples: Choosing and Redesigning Families 327 When Friends Are Like Family 328 Real Families Coparenting by Gay Men and Lesbians 329 Summary 330 10 Becoming Parents and Experiencing Parenthood 333 Fertility Patterns and Parenthood Options in the United States 334 Unmarried Parenthood 335 Forgoing Parenthood: “What If We Can’t?” “Maybe We Shouldn’t” 337 Waiting a While: Parenthood Deferred 338 How Expensive Are Children? 339 Choosing When: Is There an Ideal Age at Which to Have a Child? 340 Pregnancy in the United States 341 Being Pregnant 342 Sexuality during Pregnancy 343 Men and Pregnancy 344 Experiencing Childbirth 344 The Critique against the Medicalization of Childbirth 344 The Feminist Approach 345 What Mothers Say 345 Real Families Men and Childbirth 346 Infant Mortality 347 Coping with Loss 348 Giving Birth 349 Choosing How: Adoptive Families 350 Characteristics of Adoptive Families 350 Open Adoption 351 Public Policies, Private Lives When Adoptions Dissolve 352 The Not-So-Empty Nest: Adult Children and Parents Together 293 Reevaluation 294 Aging and Later-Life Marriages 294 Marriages among Older Couples 296 Widowhood 296 Enduring Marriages 298 Summary 300 9 Unmarried Lives: Singlehood and Cohabitation 303 Singlehood 304 The Unmarried Population 304 Popular Culture Celebrating and Studying Singlehood 305 Never Married Singles in America: An Increasing Minority 306 Relationships among the Unmarried 307 Types of Never-Married Singles 308 Singlism and Matrimania 309 Cohabitation 310 The Rise of Cohabitation 310 Types of Cohabitation 312 What Cohabitation Means to Cohabitors 314 Cohabitation and Remarriage 314 Common Law Marriages and Domestic Partnerships 315 Cohabitation and Marriage Compared 316 24251_00_fm_pi-xxv.indd xii24251_00_fm_pi-xxv.indd xii 1/16/10 4:03:29 AM1/16/10 4:03:29 AM Copyright 2011 Cengage Learning. All Rights Reserved. May not be copied, scanned, or duplicated, in whole or in part. xiii contents Dual-Earner and Dual-Career Families 392 Typical Dual Earners 392 Housework 392 Emotion Work 394 Caring for Children 395 How the Division of Household Labor Affects Couples 396 Atypical Dual Earners: Shift Couples and Peer Marriages 398 Shift Work and Family Life 398 Peer and Postgender Marriages 400 Coping in Dual-Earner Marriages 400 At-Home Fathers and Breadwinning Mothers 401 Family Issues in the Workplace 402 Discrimination against Women 403 The Need for Adequate Child Care 403 Older Children, School-Age Child Care, and Self-Care 405 Infl exible Work Environments, Stressful Households, and the Time Bind 406 Living without Work: Unemployment and Families 408 Economic Distress 409 Emotional Distress 409 Coping with Unemployment 410 Real Families A Whole Street Full of Out-of- Work Dads 411 Reducing Work–Family Confl ict 411 Public Policies, Private Lives The Family and Medical Leave Act 413 Summary 414 Becoming a Parent 352 Taking on Parental Roles and Responsibilities 354 Stresses of New Parenthood 355 Parental Roles 355 Motherhood 356 Fatherhood 357 What Parenthood Does to Parents 359 Exploring Diversity Beyond the Stereotypes of Young African American Fathers 361 Strategies and Styles of Child Rearing 362 Contemporary Child-Rearing Strategies 362 Styles of Child Rearing 363 Popular Culture Calling Nanny 911 364 What Do Children Need? 364 What Do Parents Need? 366 Diversity in Parent–Child Relationships 366 Effects of Parents’ Marital Status 366 Ethnicity and Parenting 367 Gay and Lesbian Parents and Their Children 367 Real Families Having a Gay Parent 369 What about Nonparental Households? 369 Parenting and Caregiving in Later Life 370 Parenting Adult Children 370 Grandparenting 371 Children Caring for Parents 372 Caring for Aging Parents 373 Summary 374 11 Marriage, Work, and Economics 379 Workplace and Family Linkages 381 It’s About Time 381 Time Strains 383 Work and Family Spillover 383 The Familial Division of Labor 386 Exploring Diversity Industrialization “Creates” the Traditional Family 387 The Traditional Pattern 387 Men’s Traditional Family Work 388 Women’s Traditional Family Work 388 Women in the Labor Force 389 Why Has Women’s Employment Increased? 390 Women’s Employment Patterns 391 24251_00_fm_pi-xxv.indd xiii24251_00_fm_pi-xxv.indd xiii 1/16/10 4:03:47 AM1/16/10 4:03:47 AM Copyright 2011 Cengage Learning. All Rights Reserved. May not be copied, scanned, or duplicated, in whole or in part. xiv contents Marital and Intimate Partner Rape 428 Violence in Gay and Lesbian Relationships 429 Dating Violence and Date Rape 429 Issues and Insights “CALL ME!!! Where ARE U? ☺” 430 Tweens, Teens, and Young Adults: Dating Violence and Abuse 430 Date Rape and Coercive Sex 431 When and Why Some Women Stay in Violent Relationships 432 The Costs of Intimate Violence 433 Children as Victims: Child Abuse and Neglect 434 Prevalence of Child Maltreatment 434 Families at Risk 437 Hidden Victims of Family Violence: Siblings, Parents, and the Elderly 438 Sibling Violence 438 Public Policies, Private Lives “Nixzmary’s Law” 439 Parents as Victims 440 Elder Abuse 440 The Economic Costs of Family Violence 441 Real Families Working the Front Line in the Fight against Child Abuse 442 Responding to Intimate and Family Violence 442 Intervention and Prevention 442 Intimate Partner Violence and the Law 443 Working with Offenders: Abuser Programs 443 Confronting Child and Elder Abuse 444 Child Sexual Abuse 444 Children at Risk 445 Forms of Intrafamilial Child Sexual Abuse 445 Sibling Sexual Abuse 445 Effects of Child Sexual Abuse 446 Summary 447 13 Coming Apart: Separation and Divorce 451 The Meaning of Divorce 452 The Legal Meaning of Divorce 452 The Realities of Divorce 453 12 Intimate Violence and Sexual Abuse 417 Intimate Violence and Family Violence: Defi nitions and Prevalence 419 Types of Intimate Violence 419 Prevalence of Intimate Violence 420 Issues and Insights Does Divorce Make You Safer? 421 Why Families Are Violent: Models of Family Violence 422 Individualistic Explanations 422 Ecological Model 422 Feminist Model 422 Social Stress and Social Learning Models 422 Exchange–Social Control Model 423 The Importance of Gender, Power, Stress and Intimacy 423 Women and Men as Victims and Perpetrators 424 Female Victims and Male Perpetrators 425 Characteristics of Male Perpetrators 426 Female Perpetrators and Male Victims 426 Familial and Social Risk Factors 427 Socioeconomic Class and Race 427 Socioeconomic Class 427 Race 428 24251_00_fm_pi-xxv.indd xiv24251_00_fm_pi-xxv.indd xiv 1/16/10 4:03:49 AM1/16/10 4:03:49 AM Copyright 2011 Cengage Learning. All Rights Reserved. May not be copied, scanned, or duplicated, in whole or in part. xv contents 14 New Beginnings: Single- Parent Families, Remarriages, and Blended Families 485 Single-Parent Families 486 Characteristics of Single-Parent Families 487 Children in Single-Parent Families 490 Successful Single Parenting 491 Binuclear Families 493 Subsystems of the Binuclear Family 493 Recoupling: Courtship in Repartnering 494 Remarriage 495 Rates and Patterns of Remarriage 495 Characteristics of Remarriage 497 Marital Satisfaction and Stability in Remarriage 497 Real Families When Families Blend 498 Blended Families 498 A Different Kind of Family 499 The Developmental Stages of Stepfamilies 500 Stepparenting 502 Problems of Women and Men in Stepfamilies 502 Issues and Insights Claiming Them as Their Own: Stepfather–Stepchild Relationships 504 Children in Stepfamilies 505 Confl ict in Stepfamilies 505 Public Policies, Private Lives Inconsistent to Nonexistent: Lack of Legal Policies about Stepfamilies 507 Strengths of Stepfamilies 507 Summary 508 Divorce in the United States 454 Measuring Divorce: How Do We Know How Much Divorce There Is? 454 Divorce Trends in the United States 456 Factors Affecting Divorce 456 Societal Factors 456 Demographic Factors 457 Exploring Diversity Divorced and Seeking Remarriage in India 458 Life Course Factors 459 Family Processes 461 No-Fault Divorce 463 Uncoupling: The Process of Separation 463 Initiators and Partners 463 The New Self: Separation Distress and Postdivorce Identity 464 Establishing a Postdivorce Identity 464 Popular Culture Making Personal Trouble Public: Divorce and the Internet 465 Dating Again 466 Consequences of Divorce 466 Economic Consequences of Divorce 466 Noneconomic Consequences of Divorce 468 Public Policies, Private Lives How Can You Get a Divorce if They Don’t Recognize Your Marriage? 469 Children and Divorce 470 How Children Are Told 470 The Three Stages of Divorce for Children 471 Children’s Responses to Divorce 472 Perspectives on the Long-Term Effects of Divorce on Children 474 Just How Bad Are the Long-Term Consequences of Divorce? 475 Child Custody 476 Types of Custody 476 Noncustodial Parents 477 Divorce Mediation 478 What to Do about Divorce 479 Issues and Insights: Covenant Marriage as a Response to Divorce 480 Summary 481 24251_00_fm_pi-xxv.indd xv24251_00_fm_pi-xxv.indd xv 1/16/10 4:03:56 AM1/16/10 4:03:56 AM Copyright 2011 Cengage Learning. All Rights Reserved. May not be copied, scanned, or duplicated, in whole or in part. xvi contents Glossary 527 Bibliography 540 Photo Credits 590 Indexes 592 Appendix A Sexual Structure and the Sexual Response Cycle 510 Appendix B Pregnancy, Conception, and Fetal Development 517 Appendix C The Budget Process 521 24251_00_fm_pi-xxv.indd xvi24251_00_fm_pi-xxv.indd xvi 1/19/10 7:54:37 AM1/19/10 7:54:37 AM Copyright 2011 Cengage Learning. All Rights Reserved. May not be copied, scanned, or duplicated, in whole or in part. xvii Exploring Diversity Ghost or Spirit Marriage 8 Researching Dating Violence Cross- Culturally 55 The Work Daughters Do to Help Families Survive 117 Isn’t It Romantic? Cultural Constructions of Love 143 Gender and Marital Confl ict among Korean Immigrants 244 Arranged Marriage 267 Beyond the Stereotypes of Young African American Fathers 361 Industrialization “Creates” the Traditional Family 387 Divorced and Seeking Remarriage in India 458 Popular Culture Cartoon Controversy: Are SpongeBob SquarePants and The Simpsons Threats to Family Values? 22 Evaluating the Advice and Information Genre 32 Can We See Ourselves in Zits? Comic Strips and Changes in Family Life 76 Video Gender: Gender, Music Videos, and Video Games 124 Chocolate Hearts, Roses, and . . . Breaking Up? What about “Happy Valentine’s Day”? 165 Sex, Teens, and Television 182 Staying Connected with Technology 223 Can We Learn Lessons about Marriage from “Wife Swap” and “Trading Spouses?” 290 Celebrating and Studying Singlehood 305 Calling Nanny 911 364 Making Personal Trouble Public: Divorce and the Internet 465 Issues and Insights Technological Togetherness 18 Conceptualizing in a Disaster 38 Girls and Violence 120 The Different Meanings of Virginity Loss 186 “What Are We Fighting About?” 248 Living Apart Together 324 Does Divorce Make You Safer? 421 “CALL ME!!! Where ARE U? ☺” 430 Covenant Marriage as a Response to Divorce 480 …