English peer review - Humanities
Share three strengths of the draft essay.Share three aspects of the draft essay that could be improved upon before the final submission.Respectfully share your opinion on how well you think this draft meets the assignment requirements.Open the Peer Review worksheet, type feedback, save it, and attach it to your response in your peer’s thread. week6_rough_draft_elizaneth_.docx peer_review_worksheet__2_.docx Unformatted Attachment Preview 1 Week 6 Writing Assignment: Analytical Paper Rough Draft Elizabeth Pino West Coast University 2 Prompt 1 Kate Chopin, an American author that was best known for the stories she wrote, these stories focused on the inner lives of smart, sensitive women. Growing up she lived in St. Louis during the Civil War, around the 1880’s she became a writer in order to support her family. “Her life had an array of traumatic events which included losing her only female best friend, but still managed to publish over one hundred stories, essays, and sketches in literary magazines” (Wyatt, 1995, para.8). Within these varieties of written work, she made two famous stories Story of an Hour and Desiree’s Baby. The Story of an Hour was written in the late 19th century and is a story about a woman being given news that her husband has died, it focuses on the idea of freedom. Desiree’s Baby was another of Chopin’s work which themed about racism, the story is set to be taken place in Louisiana before the American Civil War. Within Story of an Hour and Desiree’s Baby there are elements and similarities that these two stories share, which include marriage problems, females overcoming weakness, untimely deaths, and both protagonists being victims of irony. To begin with, there is evidence on both of Chopin’s stories that unequal and unhappy marriage is a common similarity they share. “And yet she had loved him-sometimes. Often, she had not. What did it matter! What could love, the unsolved mystery, count for in the face of this possession of self-assertion which she suddenly recognized as the strongest impulse of her being! Free! Body and soul free! She kept whispering” (Chopin, 1894, para.15). In this quote from Story of an Hour It is expressed that Mrs. Mallard has some love for her husband but she realized that she is now free from him after learning that he has passed away, revealing her feeling toward her marriage as incomplete. “She knew hat she would weep again when she saw the kind, tender hands folded in death; the face that had never looked save with love upon her, fixed and gray and 3 dead. But she saw beyond the bitter moment a long procession of years to come that would belong to her absolutely. And she opened and spread her arms out to them in welcome” (Chopin, 1894, para.13). Mrs. Mallard is expressing that she will shed a few tears once she sees her dead husband but pondering at what the future holds for her as a widow, husband and marriage free, sets her in an optimistic place. “In silence he ran his cold eyes over the written words. He said nothing. Shall I go Armand? She asked in tones sharp with agonized suspense” (Chopin, 1892, para.29). From Desiree’s Baby” It can be concluded that Desiree was in an unfair marriage as Armand oversaw their relationship. The way she asks if she should go, comes to show that it is in fact Armand who has the final word and Desiree must do what he says. “She turned away like one stunned by a blow, and walked slowly towards the door, hoping he would call her back” (Chopin, 1892, para.31). At this point Desiree is certain that Armand was in total control of their marriage ending, as he was not going to chase or keep her from walking away. Within the two main characters of each story, it can be concluded that after each faced devastating news within their marriage, they both over come those weaknesses and take on a stronger approach to the situation. “She wept at once, with sudden, wild abandonment, in her sister’s arms. When the storm of grief had spent itself, she went to her room alone. She would have no one follow her” (Chopin, 1894, para.3). Soon after Mrs. Mallard learns the devastating news that her husband has died, she cried, but quickly she over came that weakness and isolated herself to think upon how she will gain benefit from the situation. “The vacant stare and the look of terror that had followed it went from her eyes. They stayed keen and bright. Her pulses beat fast, and the coursing blood warmed and relaxed every inch of her body” (Chopin, 1894, para.11). Mrs. Mallard is overcoming guilt that has taken over her and overcomes it. “She looked from her child to the boy who stood beside him, and back again; over and over. Ah! It was a cry 4 that she could not help; which she was not conscious of having uttered. The blood turned like ice in her veins, and a clammy moisture gathered upon her face” (Chopin, 1892, para.17). In Desiree’s Baby it can be seen that after Desiree was relaxing and watching her baby sleep on her, she quickly noticed that he was not the same as her and in fact has many similarities to one of the quadroon boys, which was black. This made her body to react in such a way that, she knew she had to become strong and overcome a possible confrontation with Armand. “Tell me what it means! She cried despairingly. “It means,” he answered lightly, “That the child is not white; it means that you are not white. A quick conception of all that this accusation meant for her, nerved her with unwonted courage to deny it. “It is a lie; it is not true, I am white! […] Look at my hand; whiter than yours, Armand,” she laughed hysterically” (Chopin, 1892, para.21-23). Desiree filled with courage to fight against what Armand is accusing her of, being black, she gained confronted him of his accusations, proving that she is not black. Continuing Chopin’s stories, an untimely death is approached at the end of each of her pieces of work, the two deaths differ but combine by unforeseen events. “Someone was opening the front door with a latchkey. It was Brently Mallard who entered […] When the doctors came, they said she had died of heart disease-of joy that kills” (Chopin, 1894, para. 20-21). Mrs. Mallard suddenly died from the shock of seeing her husband in Story of an Hour, Chopin surprises the reader with this sudden twist. She was just about to start living her life as a widow when she quickly became overpowered by the emotions of seeing her supposed to be dead husband and passed away. “She did not take the broad, beaten road which led to the far-off plantation of Valmonde. She walked across a deserted field […] She disappeared among the reeds and willows that grew thick along the banks of the deep, sluggish bayou; and she did not come back again” (Chopin, 1892, para.34-35). Due to the circumstances that Desiree faced in 5 Desiree’s Baby, she did not want to keep living her life without Armand and she chooses the road to death. Being young and having an opportunity to go to her mother’s place was an option but she oversees that and instead faced death on her own. Irony plays a role in the ending of both stories; it is clear on the plot twist Chopin intended for the readers. “Great care was taken to break to her as gently as possible the news of her husband’s death. […] It was Brently Mallard who entered, a little travel-stained, composedly carrying his gripsack and umbrella. He had been far from the scene of the accident and did not even know there had been one. He stood amazed at Josephine’s piercing cry; at Richards quick motion to screen him from the view of his wife” (Chopin, 1894, para.20-21). Chopin has fully intended for the “dead husband” to reappear and no one was expecting his return. The wife, sister, and friend were all shocked to see Mr. Mallard, as he was supposed to be in the scene of the accident. Even though the other characters where trying to protect Mrs. Mallard feelings about her husbands death, (they could have avoided telling her if they would have confirmed with a reliable source), they did more harm because she was the one who died at the end, how ironic. “When the Doctors came, they said she had died of heart disease-of joy that kills” (Chopin, 1894, Para.21). The joy of seeing her husband was not what killed Mrs. Mallard, but it was the pain of knowing that she was not going to experience her new happy life as a widow that did. “But it was not Desiree’s; it was part of an old letter from his mother to his father. He read it. She was thanking God for the blessing of her husband’s love:-“But, above all,” she wrote, “night and day, I thank the good God for having so arranged our lives that our dear Armand will never know what his mother, who adores him, belongs to the race that is cursed with the brand of slavery” (Chopin, 1892, para. 38-39). After Armand let his wife Desiree go for assuming she was of the black race and giving him a black baby, it turned out to be discovered that it was him all 6 along who has the black roots in his blood. It is also noted that his mother thanks his father for loving her no matter what, how ironic since Armand switched up on his wife and treated her with no love after realizing they had a black baby. Chopin makes several similarities in her work of Story of an Hour and Desiree’s Baby, these two stories share various elements in correlations with each other including, marriage problems, females overcoming weakness, untimely deaths, and both protagonist being victims of irony. “Kate Chopin fully shows us the tremendous conflict between life and death among those women who had the more self-awareness, the less social living space according to the established social norms 100 years ago in a dramatic way” (Wan, 2009, p.167). Chopin wanted to suggest that women, of the era in which she wrote these stories, faced issues such as freedom due to society and marriages. “Chopin’s style offers opportunities to point out the virtues of conciseness; strong, clear, imagery; symbolism; understatement; humor; and irony” (Skaggs, n.d, para.3). No matter the time era, Chopin makes her stories relatable to the present society as many of her work is written on morals that are currently normal, still having an effect on the reader including how they interpret the situation. Overall, it can be concluded that quite the controversial figure, Chopin was a feminist, and she portrayed that throughout her stories. 7 References Chopin, K. (1894) The Story of an Hour Chopin, K. (1892) Desiree’s Baby Skaggs, P. (n.d) Significant Form, Style, or Artistic Conventions: https://faculty.georgetown.edu/bassr/heath/syllabuild/iguide/chopin.html Wan, X. (2009) English Language Teaching: Kate Chopin’s View on Death and Freedom in The Story of an Hour: Abstract, (Vol.2, No.4) ccsenet.org/journal.html Wyatt. N (1995) Biography of Kate Chopin https://archive.vcu.edu/english/engweb/webtexts/hour/katebio.html ENGL 240 Peer Review Worksheet For this assignment, your objective is to provide high-level feedback to one of your fellow classmates that will help to improve her or his final analytical paper. Please completely fill out each question in this worksheet to help your fellow student. Name of the student whose essay you reviewed: Your name: Answer each of the following questions, providing specific examples when possible. Remember that you can give both positive and negative answers to help highlight the best aspects of the essay and those areas that need revision. Content-Specific Questions YES NO YES NO Can you identify the thesis statement? Does it address the main points that the writer will be making in the essay? Has the writer addressed all aspects of critical reading and analysis as covered in this course? Add any notes on content here: Organization Is the introduction effective in engaging the reader while providing an overview of the main ideas of the paper? Can you identify the topic sentences for each body paragraph? Does the paper effectively use transitions? Is the conclusion effective? Does the conclusion summarize the main points and bring the discussion to a logical and satisfying ending? Add any notes on organization here: Format YES NO YES NO Does the essay use appropriate APA formatting, including double-spacing, Times New Roman, 12-point font, 1 margins, and appropriate paragraph indentations? Can you identify any areas where outside sources appear to be used without including in-text citations? If so, provide specific examples here: When in-text citations are used, do they follow APA formatting? Can you identify any issues with the reference page? If so, please provide specific examples: Grammar and Mechanics Does the writer use proper grammar, punctuation, and spelling? Is the writing clear and comprehensible throughout the draft? If not, provide specific examples of areas that need improvement here: When in-text citations are used, do they follow APA formatting? Can you identify any issues with the reference page? If so, please provide specific examples: ... Purchase answer to see full attachment
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